MARRIAGE COUNSELING

RULE NUMBER 8

RULE: HUG AND KISS EACH OTHER DAILY

Affection is a strong part of every relationship. Note that even when couples are not really at peace, if they can summon the courage to hug and kiss each other before they depart for the day activities, it becomes a good antidote in resolving their conflict. So if you must succeed in your marital relationship, you must adhere to rule number 8.   

MARRIAGE COUNSELING

RULE NUMBER 7

RULE: Resolve your conflict yourself

Over time most couples who take the pain to resolve their conflicts themselves hardly find themselves in a serious mess. When you are angry over an issue that need attention, give yourselves adequate time to relax and find a conducive environment to sort it out without introducing a third party. This demonstrate a high level of maturity in marriage and that you are willing to learn together. In African context, most men want to dominate an argument and ignoring their partners input. In America and Britain when men ignore or hurt  their wife or refuse to involve them in sensitive decision, they sought the help of marriage therapist. Note, men should take the lead and resolve any conflict whatsoever with their partner without violent. Aristotle said ''SAY SORRY TO A WOMAN EVEN IF SHE IS WRONG''. To succeed as a couple adhere to rule number 7.      

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MARRIAGE COUNSELING

RULE NUMBER 6

RULE: COUPLES SHOULD BE ALONE FOR THE FIRST FIVE YEARS OF THEIR MARRIAGE.

I met a man who has been married for the past fifteen years, he told me the only mistake he made in the early stage of his marriage is to allow someone living with them in the first five years of their marriage. He said i never appreciate my wife until we stayed alone.

Newly married couples came from different background and training, their five years should be a period of leaning and understanding each other.It should equally be a period for them to enjoy honeymoon. Some marriage therapist said honeymoon for couples should be a lifetime pursuit. So if you must succeed in your marriage adhere to rule number 6. 

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MARRIAGE COUNSELING

RULE NUMBER 5

RULE: Do not allow your conflict to stay 24 hours before it is resolved.

Your partner play a major role in your day to day activities, conflict is part of every relationship, is a process that help couples to clarify and understand each other but not a period for violent.

Some school of thought said conflict is another way of moving disagreement to agreement.

Warning: If you fail to resolve your conflict within 24 hours, your partner might discuss it with a third party, this might expose you to emotional risk. This is how extra marital affairs start.

MARRIAGE COUNSELING

RULE NUMBER 4
Share your task 

For newly married couples, it is evidenced that both parties will want to go extra miles because of the strong feelings of courtship that was brought into the marriage. Surveyed carried out on most divorced couples indicated that part of the thing that lead separation of couples is whether the husband want to do nothing and wife doing virtually all the house chores. 

Note: 

1. Husband should work on the task involving hard task.
2. Wife should do more of children management and cooking.
3. If any of the partner is ill, you should doubled your effort accomplish all task.
4. Finally, for couples to be successful, they should adhere strictly to rule number four. 

RULE NUMBER 3
Have a joint account for major financial decision and
have a personal account for miscellaneous expenses.
Over time couples have separated from each other because of minor financial misunderstanding. In my interview with matured couples recently, about 80 percent of the couples claimed that most of the conflict at home is caused as a result of financial conflict.
Admonition:
Always plan and have a budget
Let your partner know what you earn
Always adhere to rule number three
Warning

• Never fight over a menial issues that will break a relationship that takes years to build.
• Be transparent 
• Involve your partner in major financial decision. 
• Finally always adhere to rule number three
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MARRIAGE COUNSELING

RULE NUMBER 2
 

LEARN TO USE THE MAGIC WORDS

• PLEASE 
• FORGIVE ME
• THANK YOU
• I'M WRONG
• YOU ARE RIGHT      http://multiskilledprofessionals4all.blogspot.com/

MARRIAGE COUNSELING

RULES OF MARRIAGE

RULE NO 1: Respect your partner in all things.

Marriage involves two people who is working to achieve a purpose or an objective. The only only way for you to achieve this purpose is to first respect each other. The way you address your partner go a long way to determine whether the relationship will go far or not. If you are fond of bullying your partner,then your relationship will end long before you anticipated. Once again, if you must succeed, you need to keep golden rule number one.

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LIFESTYLES-FAMOUS QUOTES FROM NELSON MANDELA

There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered.

» There is nothing like returning to a place that reminds unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered.

» We must use time wisely and forever realize that the time is always ripe to do right.

» When the water starts boiling it is foolish to turn off the heat.

» These numbers are staggering, in fact incomprehensible. By all accounts, we are dealing with the greatest health crisis in human history.

» We recall the joy and excitement of a nation that had found itself, the collective relief that we had stepped out of our restrictive past, and the expectant air of walking into a brighter future.

» A good head and good heart are always a formidable combination. But when you add to that a literate tongue or pen, then you have something very special.

LIFESTYLES-FAMOUS QUOTES FROM NELSON MANDELA

  Let there be work, bread, water and salt for all.

» Money won't create success, the freedom to make it will.

» Never, never and never again shall it be that this beautiful land will again experience the oppression of one by another.

» Only free men can negotiate; prisoners cannot enter into contracts. Your freedom and mine cannot be separated.

» The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

» There can be no keener revelation of a society's soul than the way in which it treats its children.

» There is no easy walk to freedom anywhere, and many of us will have to pass through the valley of the shadow of death again and again before we reach the mountaintop of our desires.

LIFESTYLES-FAMOUS QUOTES FROM NELSON MANDELA

» I dream of the realization of the unity of Africa, whereby its leaders combine in their efforts to solve the problems of this continent. I dream of our vast deserts, of our forests, of all our great wildernesses.

» I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.

» If the United States of America or Britain is having elections, they don't ask for observers from Africa or from Asia. But when we have elections, they want observers.

» If there are dreams about a beautiful South Africa, there are also roads that lead to their goal. Two of these roads could be named Goodness and Forgiveness.

» If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart.

» If you want to make peace with your enemy, you have to work with your enemy. Then he becomes your partner.

» In my country we go to prison first and then become President.

» Let freedom reign. The sun never set on so glorious a human achievement.